Vic and Donna are married. They have a child, a precocious boy named Tad who is afraid of his closet. Which: good on you, Tad, there’s the fucking spirit of a serial killer living in there, and it keeps opening the door while you’re in bed with the lights out. Also, the evil spirit is going to possess a huge dog and give it rabies. But you’ll see. Donna has been cheating on Vic with a guy who plays tennis, drives a van with a mural on the side, and refinishes furniture. She breaks it off with Steve Kemp, TENNIS PRO, and he threatens her. Then he goes off and writes Vic a letter. THE AFFAIR IS BROUGHT TO LIGHT, just as Vic and his partner Roger have to go save their advertising agency with a trip to New York! What fun. At some point, Steve Kemp breaks into their home and comes all over their comforter. Good pun, that.
Pat: WELCOME TO CASTLE ROCK. POPULATION: MARRITAL STRIFE.
Andrea: YEAH SERIOUSLY.
What are you up to?
I mean in the book, not in life.
Pat: Pinto just crapped out, but they got back to the house. Ol’ Joe Cambers is dead as fuck.
Vic calls from Wherevertown.
Andrea: I can’t believe you just called New York City “Wherevertown.”
Pat: I didn’t know where the shit Vic and Roger went.
Andrea: You have no reading comprehension.
They went to go fix the cereal business. All of that seemed very archaic in our age of email, like, “OH HEY TRAVELING FOR BUSINESS NOT SURE WHEN GONNA BE BACK KBAI.”
Pat: I know why they went, and where their ad agency had formerly been located. Doesn’t mean the shitting account was in New York.
Andrea: OH TRUE.
That was very deux ex machina. King was like, “OH HEY HOW DO I GET EVERYONE OUT OF TOWN LOLZ.”
Pat: I don’t think that’s deus ex machina.
Andrea: Well, YOU know what I mean.
It is some Latin thing.
Pat: You mean “convenient.”
Andrea: I didn’t really care about Vic’s partner, Roger. He seemed to serve no purpose.
Pat: I don’t think you’re supposed to care.
Andrea: The whole idea of them leaving their NYC agency and going off on their own in Maine seemed kinda wonky.
Pat: It seems absolutely wonky, but Roger makes it pretty fucking clear by the end that he hates New York and will do anything to keep from having to move him family back there, so that works for the story.
I liked the interlude about George Meara, the farting mailman.
Pat: You like farting anything.
Andrea: OH. I really liked the dynamic between the Cambers and the whole idea of Charity and Joe fighting for Brett’s soul. And the visit to Mrs. Cambers’ sister, Holly’s. I thought that was well done. And I was really really happy for them that Joe Cambers died.
Pat: That was good, although, honestly, what the fuck did it have to do with anything? It’s like SK just had to make it seem like the characters didn’t JUST exist to leave Cujo on the farm.
Andrea: Well, it got them away. It was at least as integral as the stupid Roger story line.
So do you think he did a good job of that, or not?
Pat: The sister visit? Yeah, although he didn’t bother trying to rope it through the Donna/Tad storyline.
Andrea: Maybe it was to demonstrate that something good came out of the whole thing.
Pat: I mean, mother and son struggling against something evil that wants to ruin them. WE GET IT, KING.
Andrea: Right. It’s parallel.
Pat: But there’s no interplay between what’s going on, except if you make that general leap on your own.
Andrea: Which is part of what being a good reader is all about!
Pat: What, using our brains to make connections the writer didn’t bother paralleling better?
Andrea: Ha, yes. I mean, he paralleled them well enough if we made the connection, right?
Pat: This is called “Constant Readers,” not “Constantly Making Up For The Shortfalls In Your Fucking Story, Stevie.” (more…)
Andrea: Cujo! IS! NEXT!
Pat: ugh. Whatever. I quit.
IT doesn’t even show up for most of a decade.
Pat: I want to read IT this summer.
Andrea: You can still read it this summer.
We won’t be reading it for like five more summers.
Pat: Let’s do a time warp reading.
Pat: Where we time warp.
Andrea: I refuse. (more…)